5 Things You’re NOT Doing to Hire the Right People (But Should Be)
Imagine walking into an interview room, feeling the unspoken tension between two people trying to "win" the conversation. But what if interviews weren’t battles to conquer but opportunities to connect? What if the key wasn’t in selling yourself but in truly understanding the other person?
Hiring the right people—and winning at interviews—isn’t about rapid-fire questions or dazzling answers. It’s about creating trust, understanding motivations, and building a connection. Whether you’re the one doing the hiring or the candidate trying to impress, the rules of influence and persuasion apply equally. I will take you through proven techniques to uncover the truth in interviews, ask the right questions, and walk away confident that you’ve made—or received—the best offer.
Truth be told: I didn’t like being interviewed for a job, and the more I wanted the job, the more my palms sweated, I over thought the answers and lost my authenticity. Think of the interview process as a dance. One person leads, the other follows, and together, you create something harmonious—or end up stepping on each other’s toes. In my early days as a Manager, I treated interviews like chess games, strategising moves and counter-moves. Yet, I found my best hires didn’t come from my most "clever" interviews but from the ones where I truly connected with the person across the table.
Take Sarah, for example. She wasn’t the most technically skilled candidate for the role, but her curiosity shone through when she asked open-ended questions that made me think differently about the job itself. By reflecting my tone, mirroring my language, and showing genuine interest, she created a connection that went beyond her résumé. And she became one of the most successful members of the team.
Here’s how you can master the art of influence, both as an interviewer and a candidate:
Leverage the “Know, Like, Trust” Framework (thanks Andrew Bustamante legend!):
People hire people they trust. Trust is built through familiarity (knowing), rapport (liking), and reliability (trusting). Mirror the other person’s behaviour, language, and tone to create an unconscious sense of connection.
Ask More Questions—But the Right Kind:
Avoid rapid-fire questions. Instead, ask open-ended ones like:
“What would success in this role look like in six months?”
“What excites you most about your team?”
“What would be the first opportunity/challenge you will give me when I start?” (ohh did I just get the interviewer to think about me into their future?;-))
Questions like these show curiosity, preparation, and a genuine desire to understand.
Read the Room:
Observe body language and listen to verbal cues. Are they leaning in? Smiling? Using specific words repeatedly? Reflect these behaviours subtly to build rapport.
Tap into Core Motivations with the RICE Framework:
Reward, Ideology, Coercion, Ego. Understanding which of these drives your interviewer or candidate can help you tailor your responses to align with their values.
Invest in the Four C’s of Influence:
Consideration: Empathise with the other person’s perspective.
Consistency: Be reliable in your values, actions, and communication.
Collaboration: Approach the discussion as a partnership, not a power play.
Control: Use your influence to guide the conversation toward your goals.
Remember the tension we started with? That invisible tug-of-war? The best interviews aren’t about power dynamics—they’re about creating a shared experience. By focusing on connection, curiosity, and influence, you transform interviews from stressful interrogations into opportunities for genuine understanding.
Winning at interviews—or hiring the right person—isn’t about rehearsed answers or trick questions. It’s about aligning values, demonstrating trust, and building rapport. The next time you step into an interview room, think of it as more than a conversation—it’s the start of a relationship. With the right tools, you won’t just get the job or make the hire; you’ll find the perfect fit.
Now, take these insights and apply them. Because in the world of business, those who connect, influence, and inspire always win.